The true story about Avery Hawke
by hobbithase
Summary: <html><head></head>Avery Hawke knows about all the wild stories about her life in Kirkwall. She knows that Varric is the one, who started them and tries to fix them by telling how all of it really happened, because Varric changed some things and left other things out...</html>


My name is Avery Hawke. You know all the stories about me? How I defeated the Arishok in a mighty fight or slayed a dragon near Kirkwall together with its masses of new borns? Well... I guess my good friend Varric exaggerated there a little. chuckle Oh Varric... you really had issues going on with my little brother, right? Cause you know... for starters: one female dragon can't lay so many eggs without dying out of exhaustion and secondly... I'm blind.

When I was five years old, I slowly lost my eyesight. There was nothing we could do about it. Not even my father. My mother cried and prayed to the Maker that he may help her little girl. But he didn't. My world got darker and darker, until darkness surrounded me. It was hard for me. I was still a little child and didn't understand what was happening to me. But I got used to it. And then, something weird happened. My mother put me to bed and I fell asleep, and as I opened my eyes, I stood on a strange, little island. I looked around and noticed that I was fully aware of me being there and that it was not a typical dream of mine. I enjoyed being able to see again and investigated the island. When I came to the island's edge I saw that it was floating and that there were other islands like mine as well, floating around. And then I saw a pitch black town, far far away from where I was. But I could still see it very clearly. And then I heard soft, whispering voices all around me. I wasn't scared at all. They sounded curious, not dangerous. After fully examining my little island, I noticed another one, not far away from mine. I don't know how to describe it, but it send a warm and safe feeling to me. I knew that nothing bad was waiting there for me, so I wished to go over there.

_If only there was a bridge_, I thought. _Then I could go over there and take a look_.

And then a bridge appeared out of nowhere. I was so happy and went on it and went over to the other island. And guess who I met there? My father. He was so surprised to see me. Especially that I was aware of being there. We talked with each other, he asked me a few things and when I woke up, and everything was dark again, he came to me and told me, that I was a mage.

And maybe even a special one. He used the word _dreamer_. Since then he studied much about the phenomenon of dreamers and told me to not make any deals with spirits or demons in the fade. I was seven at that time and I don't know why, but I wasn't scared of the fade at all. Yes, demons were approaching me, but I could change the fade with just my will and it was easy for me to escape. My father taught me everything he knew and could find out and he helped me to gain control over my magical powers too. I may be blind, but I'm still a mage. I learned to feel the spells with my whole body, learned how to use them, how to control their strength. And with that and my teachings in and about the fade (yes, my father taught me in the fade too) I suddenly began to feel other people's energy. I could tell, where my father or my mother where in the house. Later I could locate my family on wider ranges too, I could feel their emotions and then their energies appeared as colourful shadows. My connection to the fade and my magic allow me to see people as coloured shapes and to distinguish them by their energy. If I captured the energy of a person, I would never forget it or mistake it for someone else's. Some people tried to trick me, saying they were someone else, but I knew who they were. With my powers growing, I started to feel a connection to my surroundings too. My senses are sharper than others' by nature, because my eyes don't work, but I got a feeling for the earth, plants and animals too. Though I still can't walk around like a person who is able to see. But I can sense where I can find water, or where other people or creatures are. And I have Purple. Oh, I'm sorry. Purple is my mabari. My father told me about a dog owner in Lothering who had new born mabari-puppies. We went there to take a look... or a touch in my case, and suddenly one of them started to get close to me.

„She chose you.", the owner said. „You can keep her if you want."

My father wanted to pay him but the man refused. Maybe he pitied me and wanted to please me. He succeeded. I gave her the name Purple because that was her energy's colour. A bright and shiny purple. I really liked it. Purple and I became best friends and still are. You know, Mabaris can get very old, older than dogs normally get. And I'm glad for that because she is not only my best friend, she is also my guide dog. My parents were relieved to see how well I managed to live my life with my magic and Purple's help and gave me some space to move around on my own. My little sister kind of made me her idol and my brother... well... he started to get very protective of me. Not only because I was blind and a mage. Also because I'm a girl. He thought he had to look out for suspicious guys who wanted to force themselves upon me. He always ignored the fact that I was able to feel if they wanted to harm me. Their energy told me. Everything was fine, until my father died. He got very sick and left this world... mother barely managed to get over it and Carver suddenly was left with the duty to lead our family. I helped him as much as I could, but it still was tough. Especially after the Blight had started. Carver wanted to protect us and thought of joining the army. But he couldn't leave us alone, so he stayed and had to endure the looks of some of the villagers who didn't understand why a young and healthy man who even was able to fight, wouldn't serve his country. They pissed Carver off, and me too. Purple always growled at them and scared them off. Such a good girl.

And then we had to flee. Carver managed to get a horse for me, so we would be faster. Even though I knew Lothering and some parts of the wilds very well, I wasn't able to run without stumbling and falling down because I couldn't possibly know the whereabouts of stones and holes. The horse was a big help, until we were attacked by more and more darkspawn. I was painfully aware of them, because their energy was even darker than black could ever be, I don't know how to describe it better, and it gave me a headache to feel them. But I didn't know, that they also had bows and suddenly my horse was attacked and collapsed. It nearly crushed me but I somehow managed to get away before the poor thing could fall on me. Purple stayed at my side and I managed to use some spells against the darkspawn. I had to be careful with my magic because my siblings were moving so quickly while fighting, that I couldn't fight without risking to hit them. So I concentrated on the darkspawn who weren't near them at all.

Now I had to walk too and we had to slow down. Shortly after that we met Aveline and her husband. My siblings helped them to fight, while I stayed with my mother. I held her tight and trusted in Purple's ability to protect us, should anything happen.

Aveline's husband seemed not to be as happy to see us, as I was to see them. More fighters meant more protection. He saw Bethany using her spells and wanted to arrest her. Seriously, there couldn't have been a worse place to do that. Aveline stopped him and Carver moved between him and Bethany. He would never allow anyone to hurt her, or us. Wesly calmed down and suddenly concentrated on me. His energy told me, that he was confused. He could sense my magic, but he didn't see me using it. As I took Purple's leash, which my father designed a little like a horse harness, so I could better hold her and she was able to fight without entangle herself, and let her lead my way, he knew why I didn't fight. And he was torn between the feeling of pity and the urge of getting me to a Circle. A blind mage would be made tranquil the second they reach the Circle of Magi. That's why my parents decided right from the start, that they would not send me there.

Being blind was never so painful to me like in the moment I lost Bethany. Instead of letting me handle the ogre, which was right in front of me and my mother, she attacked it and drew its attention. Her body crashed on the ground and her light went out. I threw one spell after another at the monster which had killed my little sister, that kind-hearted little girl, who wanted nothing else than to be a normal child, like everyone else.

My whole concentration went on fighting the ogre. I let the earth underneath its feet crumble and swallow it down to its ankles and then threw a fireball at it. Its screams where music to my ears and so I ended it with an electricity-spell.

Don't ask me how I managed to do that. I was furious with the pain of losing Bethany and with the urge to protect mother and myself. I got on my knees, crying, and yelled Bethany's name. I knew she was gone. As did my mother, without even looking at her youngest daughter. My reaction was enough for her to know.

Well, as you all know from the stories, the darkspawn returned and nearly managed to overrun us. And then Flemeth appeared. Her energy was strange. It didn't feel human-like at all, but at the same time it was. I could feel that she noticed what I was and what I was able to do. She seemed to crow about meeting a dreamer, but didn't mention anything about it. She helped us reach Gwaren, where we could get on a ship to Kirkwall – the city of templars.


End file.
